AI gives bad advice to flatter its users, says new study on dangers of overly agreeable chatbots

Story by Matt O'brien

Artificial intelligence chatbots are so prone to flattering and validating their human users that they are giving bad advice that can damage relationships and reinforce harmful behaviors, according to a new study that explores the dangers of AI telling people what they want to hear.

There are 300,000 Canadians with Bipolar Disorder. It touches more people, and in more ways, than you think. For example, it can lead to Dangerous Behaviour, Ruined Relationships , and Getting Fired. Without treatment, some people with bipolar disorder may exhibit attention-seeking behaviors and uncontrolled emotions. It’s a serious disease, but with the right treatment, there is hope.

Global News just interviewed me about dating co-workers.  Here's a link to the video: http://globalnews.ca/news/1825385/a-third-of-canadians-have-dated-a-co-worker-says-survey/

Ever say something that you soon regretted?  Ever lash out at your partner in anger and then find it took days – or weeks – to mend the damage?  The Three Minute Rule is for you.

Black dog of depression

Some people call depression a black dog.

This is a great short animated film about what depression feels like, with a good ending.  Worth watching!

http://www.upworthy.com/what-is-depression-let-this-animation-with-a-dog-shed-light-on-it

If you are suffering from depression, counselling can help.  I use CBT and other techniques with my clients who are suffering from depression.  Don't ignore this serious health problem.  Depression is a serious matter, and good counselling CAN help.

Empathy matters

Imagine taking a selfie in front of a car accident. Or a selfie in front of a building on fire. What about a selfie at a funeral – or at Auschwitz?

any of my clients suffer from anxiety.  Some have a specific fear, like a fear of public speaking or a fear of flying.  Others seem to be a little bit afraid of almost everything – which may be a sign of Generalized Anxiety Disorder.  If you find yourself obsessing about things that worry you or make you afraid, there are things we can do to help you.

I was asked by Global News to comment on people who are “gym snobs” — people who don’t just work out a lot, but comment on the way others are working out, give unsolicited advice and boast about their training using social media. Here’s the clip where you can see what I said.

Vacations: The make or break for your relationship

For some couples, going on a vacation together and finally having some “we” time away from the kids is just what the relationship needs. Finally, adult conversation uninterrupted by the toddlers. At last, a chance to get frisky without having to squeeze everything into a 20-minute window. But there’s another side to paradise.

Sometimes people who have just lost a loved one – a parent, a spouse, a close friend – come to me hoping I can stop the pain they are feeling.  Unfortunately, acute mourning doesn’t work that way.  Pain is part of the process.  And… talking to a trained counsellor IS a great idea.

Valentine's Day can be a hard day to be single. It’s also a hard day to be in a relationship that no longer feels loving. For all my clients and friends, this is a lovely message:

WHAT HELPS YOU BE HAPPY?

It’s a myth that you are hardwired to be happy or not. Research now indicates that just isn’t the case – there’s evidence that you can learn to be happier by forming certain habits.

Recently I attended an educational seminar on job related stress and PTSD for people in front-line professions – police officers, emergency medical professionals, and so on.  Some of the information was pretty specific and will be hugely valuable next time I counsel such a professional.

Global News called me recently in relation to a story they were doing.  I was asked to comment about the phenonemon of “oversharing” via social media.

Bouncing back when you are down

We’ve all heard the expression, “When life throws you lemons, make lemonade.” Which is good advice, in terms of looking for the opportunity in every setback. But in order to have that attitude of resilience, it helps to be practicing good self-care. It’s a fact – self-care is an important part of your ability to cope with stress, adversity and change.

One of the misconceptions among lay people about Bipolar Disorder (which used to be called Manic-Depression) is that people with the disorder change their moods every few hours. 

“If you really loved me, you’d….”

Have you ever heard those words from your partner?

When we love someone, sometimes we want them to meet all of our needs.  But expecting a partner to do EVERYTHING you want, just the way you want it, is not a reasonable expectation. 

This is the time of year when many people start to feel a little down, with winter coming and it getting dark so early.  For some people, the symptoms may be more extreme and include fatigue, less energy and an increased need for sleep, more interest in food (especially "comfort food") and perhaps an associated weight gain, trouble concentrating and even an increased desire to be alone. 

Traditionally people who find themselves drinking heavily, whether it be more than two drinks daily or weekend-only binge drinking, are advised to go to Alcoholics Anonymous.  Now, I am not knocking AA.  Several of my clients became AA members before they met me and it has worked wonderfully for them (they see me for other reasons, now that the alcohol doesn’t cover up their pain).

Do you think that having more money would make you happier?  Maybe it would.  But according to a study done at two universities, therapy could be more cost effective at making you happy than getting more money.

Whether counselling will work for you is partially dependent on how willing you are to consider new ways of thinking and doing things.  As we say in the trade, “How many therapists does it take to change a lightbulb?  Only one, but the lightbulb has to want to change.”

One of the things I occasionally hear from clients is that they are disappointed with their partner because he or she “doesn’t make me happy”. The strange thing is, other people bear much less responsibility for our happiness than we may think.

Recently I got a call from a writer at Macleans magazine, who wanted me to comment about whether couples should give each other their passwords.

We all define arguing differently. For some people, any discussion with the smallest degree of conflict equals an argument. For others, a discussion is not an argument – that is a term reserved for name calling and vindictive “got you” comments.

When I hear that a couple is yelling at each other, I encourage them to reflect, “Does this serve me?  Will this have the outcome I intend?”

Blue Christmas was a song long ago by the famous 1950s singer Elvis Presley, based on the idea that Christmas without a certain someone just wasn’t the same. But there are many reasons you might be having a blue Christmas.

Here’s a great article I contributed to recently.  It really sums up how attitude is so important.  While healthy eating and exercise are great, so is loving yourself just the “weigh” you are!

Some people feel really close to their partner in the days before Valentine’s Day, and enjoy finding ways to show that they care. But for many people, Valentine’s Day brings a lot of unwanted pressure.